End of Season Rugby: Mud, Glory & Questionable Haircuts

There’s something beautifully British about the end of the rugby season. The pitches are either rock hard or mysteriously still muddy. The physio tape budget has doubled. Half the squad are “carrying a knock” (which is code for: everything hurts), and someone’s mum has already started organising the presentation evening raffle. Yes - it’s end-of-season presentation time. The moment we celebrate the heroes, thank the volunteers, and politely pretend we didn’t see that missed tackle in the semi-final. Whether you’re a grassroots club, colts side, veterans team, or a First XV with ambitions of Twickenham, the end of season do is sacred. It’s where legends are honoured, coaches get emotional, and someone absolutely insists on giving a speech far longer than necessary. So, alongside your traditional awards (Players’ Player, Coach’s Player, Top Try Scorer), here’s a list of properly British, good-natured, and polite humorous awards to keep the evening lively.

1. The “It Looked Forward to Me” Award

For the player who throws the most optimistic passes.

2. The Human Turnstile Trophy

Awarded to the player who demonstrates exceptional generosity in defence.

3. The Postcode Kicker Plaque

For kicks that travelled impressively - just not between the posts.

4. The Mud Enthusiast Medal

For the player who somehow ends every match looking like they’ve been excavating a trench.

5. The Selective Hearing Award

For outstanding ability to ignore the referee.

6. The “I’ve Got This” Award

Given to the player who calls for every high ball… and catches about half.

7. The Fashion Forward Forward

For the tight five player most likely to arrive in sliders and a questionable hoodie.

8. The Early Bath Commemorative Shield

For frequent, enthusiastic visits to the sin bin.

9. The GPS Tracker Award

For the player who covers the most ground running sideways.

10. The Commitment to the After-Match Award

For consistent, elite performance in the clubhouse.

11. The Kit Magnet Trophy

For the player who borrows the most club kit and returns the least.

12. The “Nearly” Player of the Year

For moments of absolute brilliance… almost.

13. The Social Media Manager Award

For the player more committed to Instagram stories than defensive lines.

14. The Coach’s Blood Pressure Raiser

Self-explanatory.

15. The Comeback King Award

For the veteran who retires every April and returns every September.

Rugby season is long. It’s bruising, muddy, exhilarating, frustrating, and occasionally glorious. But what keeps players coming back isn’t just the game - it’s the people.

So raise a glass, hand out a few slightly cheeky awards, thank the volunteers who wash the kit, and remind everyone why they’ll be back in pre-season pretending to enjoy fitness drills.

Because rugby isn’t just a sport.

It’s a club. It’s a community.

And occasionally, it’s a very creative excuse for a social.